Kjoy

Felt like as if it is God calling for me to come back. Many times I wanted to come back to church but somehow something will stop me, be it my mind or other issues. I miss the warm welcome feeling in church, in His arms.

Allowing the Holy Spirit renewing me…I feel the peace. Specially my driving lessons. I was very terrible in learning, very slow because I am afraid. One fine day, just half hour before the lesson begin, I slept in Kun’s car. Before sleeping, I pray to God, God please teach me how to drive, I drove like an idiot and I feel very stress. Please help me God.

In my sleep, I felt like I was driving, not the way I learn but I drive normally and I can feel the brakes, the changing gear feeling and things like that. After I wake up, I feel so fresh, and I went for my lesson and it was like prefect, just one mistake. Then I wonder if it was God, must have been Him, even my teacher thought that I was secretly driving Kun’s car without license. I just couldn’t resist the smile just because He still loves me so.

Just this morning… Kun’s relative suffers from a stroke and is still in hospital. I wanted to help and pray for him but I know it is not possible because he doesn’t believe in my Jesus. I pray in the car for don’t know how to pray for the sickness when Kun was driving me to work. The more I pray the more restless I become. Suddenly I feel sad and worried and I couldn’t go on. I start asking why to myself. No reply too. Slowly I start to doze off and I didn’t want to and I heard… rest. I have the same feeling in my sleep when I was praying for my driving! It’s like the renewing in me dwelling in me again! I just couldn’t explain how warm it felt, I feel like I am home. In that short sleep, I pray for the sick to go for this is not a curse land anymore. I wish everything would be fine.

The outside world is so cold…. I hope everyone will believe in Life